Loving, leaving, longing

A while back, my sister and I were about to cross a busy road after having wine at some joint along Cuppage Rd, Singapore. We were talking about romantic relationships — the ups, the downs, and everything in between. I told her about this one theory I firmly believe in: that there’s at least one take-home message from every relationship (and every almost-relationship) you’ve ever been in. Sometimes these nuggets of wisdom don’t sink in until much later, but sometimes they hit you once the relationship disintegrates, whatever the reason may be.

For me, these lessons have been:

Stick up for yourself, even if it means disagreeing with your partner. Love and faith alone are not enough to sustain a happy and healthy relationship (optimists will disagree). Trust your partner. Despite the fact that it’s difficult to do, acknowledging when things aren’t working out is best for both parties. The transition from lovers to friends/almost strangers never gets less shitty nor frustrating, but it’s just part of the entire healing process. It is better to not get involved with anyone at all if you can’t fully invest in them. Work on your issues with double standards. Be your own person; you don’t need someone to complete you, only someone who complements you. Hindsight is almost always 20/20. Too much of a good thing is bad for you (yes, even laughter). Know your worth. Don’t lose yourself in the process of making others happy.

On an unrelated note, after a lot of flailing and whining about what to do over the Christmas/NY break, I decided to bite the bullet and head to Berlin for a few days at the end of December. Transport to and from Berlin has been booked, as well as my stay at a backpacker’s close to the city. I like Trier, but I think it would be a pity if I stayed here the entire time school’s out. André has provided me with a list of at least fifteen places to check out while I’m in the area, which is a bit of a tall order.. But I’m super stoked to explore Berlin on my own 🙂


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